Jeremy and Martha

Hello everyone. We're well and hope the same for everyone else. It seems like so much is going on in our family. Our month seems dull compared to all the other adventures (I keep hearing little tidbits here and there). The most exciting thing this month was a visit from Mom and Dad. It was so much fun to show them around Philly and actually have room for them to stay at our house. We cleaned the house and had the basement all ready for them. Jeremy got the air mattress ready and made the bed. I put little cute decorations and a fresh bar of soap at the sink for them. (we don't have a bathroom in the basement, but we do have one of those big sinks that sometimes sit next to a washing machine). So Mom and Dad arrived (they arrived 2 hours early, think they were speeding?) and we got them all situated. We even put this cute long wall mirror down there for them. Mom loved it because it made her look tall and thin. Then one time while she was looking in it, Jeremy took the mirror and bent it, and it made poor Mom look way way opposite! I think Mom put the mirror in the garage after that. Besides the mirror trauma, I went to bed thinking everything was perfect and in order. The next morning we woke up and found out the air mattress had a leak. They slowly sank all night and by 2:00 am they were sleeping on the floor. They next night they slept on couch cushions. Actually, I think Mom still slept on the flat mattress but she was so tired she didn't notice. So the next night we had a new air mattress for them. We know for sure they at least had one night of semi-comfy sleep. Of course Dad tried to console me by saying these sleeping conditions were way better then the ones in Circleville. It just made me feel bad because I wanted everything perfect for them and it also was weird that Jeremy and I were sleeping in the master bedroom while they slept on the floor in the basement. Besides that, it was great fun. Lyle has a seriously uncontrolable obsession for water. We went to visit Mom's godfather in New Jersey. I took Lyle in the backyard to run around. He ran straight to the back where there was a bucket of water and started climbing in. Dad found him out before he tipped over. It was just an old bucket of water but Lyle didn't care and wanted to go in and then screamed loud and shrilly every time we tried to take him out. The next day we went to downtown Philly. We took a ducks tour where you load this wierd-looking vehicle that sorta looks like an open bus shaped like a boat. Anyway you tour the land and then it takes you for a trip down the Delaware River. Once we got on the water, Lyle did everything in his power to jump from our death grips on his legs to the water! I think he's part merman. So we had a fun time despite the flat mattress ordeal. Now I'm just a little concerned because Jeremy and I are planning a trip to Niagra Falls next week. I'm thinking we better strap Lyle to Jeremy and not let him down anywhere near the Falls! Take care and enjoy the summer!

PS: Got some news about our bun in the over: It's a boy!

Nick and Becca

Hello Family,

Things have been pretty exciting in Tucson for us. We got all the papers signed, thanks to a quick trip to Tucson from Mom and Dad, and were able to buy the house. We've spent the last week and a half since working on it. Nick scraped popcorn ceilings and retextured while I pulled down wallpaper and washed off glue. After a couple of late nights and family visitors we were able to get the house painted on the inside too. I just wasn't real thrilled about the previous color schemes including teal and yellow in the living room and various shades of peach throughout the rest of the house. Now we are living out of boxes while we finish up some of the details. Jonathan seems to like the new house. He rides up and down the wood floors on his fire truck. That is about the only way he'll go from one side of the house to the other, even though it actually takes him longer to drive than walk or run. In a few months we should be settled in enough to have a comfortable guest room. . . so come enjoy beautiful Tucson at our house!

Love, the Bryces

PS: Here is our new contact information:

(520) 297-5529

2841 W Camino De La Joya, Tucson AZ 85742

The month of June was a tricky one, but everyone here made it through with only little injury. As for school, I am all registered for the fall, and nearly done with part of the summer. The summer classes are cool, eh? They are so fast! I will start my second set of summer classes on July 12th. Earlier in the month Keresa and I went to Wet 'n Wild and met the Atwoods and Chris Whitneys. (Are you supposed to change the 'y' to 'i' and add 'es'?) Whitneies... It was a fun time to see all the kids and for them to meet Keresa. Kids help us remember how easy life can be. One second, they met Keresa, the next second, they were using her like a regular aunt. They told her stories, climbed all over her, etc. At her doctor's appointment this month, she was supposed to just hear the heartbeat of the 10 week-old, but the doctor rewarded her with an ultra-sound. She was pretty excited about that. She said the baby is jumping all around and going crazy in there. Maybe it will be a rambunctious little fellow, eh? I got a business license this month that enables me to buy cars at the auction, just like Uncle Vern or other dealers. Hopefully that will help us continue to live well while in school. We have a sleepover with Matt scheduled this week, so that will definitely be fun. Other than that, it's just getting warmer and warmer. I think we will be turning off the swamp cooler and switching to A/C soon. See you everyone. mk and keresa

Hello Fam,

I've been enjoying myself in the Nevada hot beside the cool pool of the Casa Blanca Resort. I tell you, it's the only way to survive the summer. I've been life guarding at the same pool as last summer and I absolutely love it. It's like going on vacation everytime I drive to work! Well, not quite, but I sure am having fun. I've been working my hardest to forge good 6AM scripture study habits, attend the temple frequently with Mom, Dad, McKay, other pre-missionary friends, etc, and also to have as many Dance Dance and Mega Bomberman parties as I can fit into my schedule. So far, the latter has been the most successful. But the temple one's pretty good too and I woke up around 8AM today, so I'm getting there.

A few weeks ago, Melanie and all her kiddos came to play with me at work while I was lifeguarding. That was pretty fun. Also it was pretty fun when all of Dad's brothers and sisters and most of their kids came down for grandpa's birthday. I spoke in church along with the high councilman (dad) and a long-time well-established um...guy (grandpa). It was pretty fun. For grandpa's party, I put together a slideshow on VCD with music stuff. A VCD is like a DVD only not on a DVD-disc. It plays on most DVD players though. If any of you want a copy of it, just give me a ring, or an email, or just tell me. I can copy them lickety-split. Another project I've been working on feverishly is putting my senior play Seven Brides for Seven Brothers onto DVD (real DVDs this time). It's been a lot of fun and I hope that I can get them out to all of my friends' parents as most of the guys that were in the play are now on missions. These are also available if anyone wants one.

I guess that's all. I think I'll be cool like Dad this month and post my talk on the internet too. See you all soon.

--Love, Matthias

Gaining Self-Reliance by Relying on the Lord

I wish to begin by comparing two groups of people from the Book of Mormon. The first is an army of Nephite warmongers, ripe for destruction. They were in constant battle with the Lamanites and had recently won a great victory. Their attitudes are described in Mormon 3:9:

"And now, because of this great thing which my people, the Nephites, had done, they began to boast in their own strength, and began to swear before the heavens that they would avenge themselves of the blood of their brethren who had been slain by their enemies.

Let's compare this group with the missionary sons of Mosiah. In Alma 26, they meet up with one another after having been quite successful in missionary service and were rejoicing quite a bit. One of them, Ammon, was recounting the events quite joyously. Aaron rebuked his words and cautioned him not to become too boastful, but Ammon's reaction is found in verses 11 and 12:

"But Ammon said unto him: I do not boast in my own strength, nor in my own wisdom; but behold, my joy is full, yea, my heart is brim with joy, and I will rejoice in my God. Yea, I know that I am nothing; as to my strength I am weak; therefore I will not boast of myself, but I will boast of my God, for in his strength I can do all things; yea, behold, many mighty miracles we have wrought in this land, for which we will praise his name forever.

Which of these two groups had self-reliant testimonies? By observing these two examples, I take that self-reliance means being able to faithfully rely on the Lord.

Growing up, my primary teachers, priesthood advisors, seminary teachers, bishops, and parents all did their best to teach and to train me in the gospel. Then last summer, all of this training would be tested when something significant happened: I moved away! At college, I was able to truly see if I had become self-reliant enough to live eight hours away from everything and everyone I'd grown up with. Away from my home and my parents' testimonies, my own faith and testimony would be thrashed by the storms of the world.

At school, I often experienced much success. My test grades were generally acceptable, my projects got turned in on time, and I usually participated in fun activities on the weekends. Things looked pretty good and like the Nephite Warriors that were destroyed, I credited my success to my own knowledge and my own strength. Helaman 4:13 explains the consequences of this ungrateful attitude:

"And because of their great wickedness, and their boastings in their own strength, they were left in their own strength."

Uh oh! Whenever I credited my prosperity to my own strength, I was left in my own strength to see just how strong I was without the Lord. My blessings of calmness and peace left me. Assignment and project deadlines would swing over me like a pendulum, and exam dates would continually haunt my calendar. I spent these times feverishly studying in the library throughout the weekends and all hours of the night, but only seeming to get further and further behind. My own strength, even pushed to the limit by 'college style studying' was never enough.

Only when I stepped back to evaluate my position of distress and correlate it to my low spirituality did I humble myself back to relying on the Lord. And when I relied on the Lord, my burdens were light enough that I could play catch up. Isaiah knows what I'm talking about:

"But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint. (Isaiah 40:31)

I am grateful for the opportunity to prepare and give this talk. I am very grateful for my parents and advisors and bishops and priesthood leaders and teachers who prepared me all my life for the time when I would have to be self-reliant. I'm grateful for the power of prayer and I bear my testimony of it. Truly the Lord does hear and answer our prayers. This was a great tool to me when I felt discouraged and alone away from home. I'm grateful for the scriptures and the power that I can receive by reading. This has been another great tool to help me through those times when I needed an extra push. I'm grateful for my testimony of the church and of this gospel. I bear testimony of Moroni's Promise in Moroni 10:3-5. This is truly the key to obtaining a self-reliant testimony. And as many times as we study, ponder, and ask God with real and sincere intent whether the gospel is true, he will reveal unto us the truth by the power of the Holy Ghost. I bear this testimony and I say these thing in Jesus' name, Amen.

Dad's June Talk

Self-Reliance

Interestingly there are 50+ members of my Dad's family here. Interesting because last summer for the family reunion I gave a talk based on the same fundamental doctrine of the church, that of agency. This time I want to dwell more on self-reliance which is an integral part of free agency. First a little foundation.

D& C 49:17 tells us man (non-gender specific) was created and existed "before the world was." D& C 93:29 says, "man was also in the beginning with God." So what's the point? Heavenly Father held the council in heaven to work out a plan of salvation or set a plan to work out the goals he has for all of us. That is our eternal salvation.

The War in Heaven refers to the conflict that took place in the pre-mortal existence among the spirit children of God. The war was primarily over how and in what manner the plan of salvation would be administered to the forthcoming human family upon the earth. The issues involved such things as agency, how to gain salvation, and who should be the Redeemer. The war broke out because one-third of the spirits refused to accept the appointment of Jesus Christ as the Savior. Such a refusal was a rebellion against the Father's plan of redemption.

Backing up a little, one of the choice spirits, the Son of the morning, had a plan to ensure everyone's salvation. Look to Moses 4:1-3. For us that would have been the 'easy' way. Lucifer likely would have controlled all we did; we wouldn't have had to make any choices or decisions. We would not have had the opportunity to think for ourselves or be able to grow spiritually or mentally. That is part of what agency is, developing our self-reliance.

So, after the war in heaven, God created the earth. He also created bodies for Adam and Eve. Turn to Genesis 3:19. In the beginning the Lord established the rule that work is the means by which men are to obtain a living when he said to Adam, "in the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto the ground." Adam and Eve worked in the fields so they could provide for their own needs and the needs of their children.

Since the beginning of time man has been counseled to earn his own way, thereby becoming self-reliant. We need to understand the reason why the Lord places so much emphasis on this principle. It is tied very closely to free agency itself.

Couples should seek inspiration from the Lord and follow the counsel of the prophets when establishing individual responsibilities. Creating a home where principles of the gospel are taught daily and where love and order abound is as important as providing the basic necessities of food and clothing. Parents need to teach children the importance, no, the necessity of work through chores and choices. It is often easier to take care of our children's needs ourselves without teaching them how to be self-reliant. But by doing so, we disobey our Heavenly Father and rob them of their learning. Children should do their part in the work of the family. It is necessary for children to have work assignments that fit their abilities. They need to be praised for their successes. Good work attitudes, habits, and skills are learned through successful experiences in the home. Sometimes people encounter hardships when trying to provide for their families. Chronic illness, the loss of a job, or the unexpected can add to the responsibilities in a home. Our Heavenly Father remembers the families in these situations and gives them the strength to carry out their duties. He will always bless them if they ask him in faith.

A story from the Reader's Digest illustrates the sad natural result of over-protecting or controlling our children or others.

"In the city of St. Augustine great flocks of sea gulls are starving amid plenty. Fishing is still good, but the gulls don't know how to fish. For generations they have depended on the shrimp fleet to toss them scraps from the nets. Now the fleet has moved... The shrimpers had created a Welfare State for the sea gulls. The big birds never bothered to learn how to fish for themselves and they never taught their children to fish. Instead they led their little ones to the shrimp nets. Now the sea gulls, the birds that are free to go and do as they please, are starving to death because they gave in to the 'something for nothing' lure! They sacrificed their independence for a handout.

"A lot of people are like that, too. They see nothing wrong in picking delectable scraps from the tax nets of the U.S. Government's 'shrimp fleet.' But what will happen when we or the government runs out of goods? What about our children of generations to come?

Let us not be gullible gulls. We must preserve our talents of self-sufficiency, our genius for creating things for ourselves, our sense of thrift and our true love of independence.

There are many parents in the Church who are making 'gullible gulls' out of their children with their permissiveness and their doling out of family resources. Parents who place their children on the dole are just as guilty as a government which places its citizens on the dole. In fact, the actions of parents in this area can be more devastating than any government program. A dole is a dole whatever its source. All of our family actions should be directed toward making our children self-reliant. We can't always control government programs, but we can control our own homes. If we will teach these principles and live them, we can do much to counter the negative effects which exist in government programs.

To some people work is a drudgery. To others it is an exciting part of life. One way to enjoy life's fullest benefits is to learn to love work. Not all of us can choose the kind of work we do. Some of us labor for long hours for the bare necessities. It is difficult to enjoy such work. Yet the happiest people have learned to enjoy their work, whatever it is. Our attitude toward work is very important. Here is a contrived story but it illustrates how one can see beyond his daily labor. A traveler passed a stone quarry where granite was being cut for a temple and saw three men working. He asked each man what he was doing. Each man's answer revealed a different attitude toward the same job. "I am cutting stone," the first man answered. The second replied, "I am earning three gold pieces per day." The third man smiled and said, "I am helping to build a house of God."

Turn to 2 Nephi 2:25. "Men are, that they might have joy." How can we obey this scripture? President Theodore Roosevelt said, "The happiest man is he who has toiled hard and successfully in his life work. The work may be done in a thousand different ways; with the brain or the hands, in the study, the field, or the workshop; if it is honest work, honestly done and well worth doing, that is all we have a right to ask."

The Lord is not pleased with those who are lazy or idle. What has He said in modern times? Turn to D&C 75:29, "The idler shall not have place in the church, except he repent and mend his ways." He also commanded in D& C 42:42, "Thou shalt not be idle; for he that is idle shall not eat the bread nor wear the garments of the laborer." Do we allow ourselves or our children to while away hours in fruitless endeavors? What are fruitless endeavors? Careers involving skill in using the internet or the X-box are limited, nor do those skills help keep the home clean and tidy. Work is essential to each of us for growth, character development, and many satisfactions that the idle never know.

We should each find the proper balance between work, rest, and relaxation. There is an old saying: "Doing nothing is the hardest work of all, because one can never stop to rest." Without work, rest and relaxation have no meaning. Not only is it pleasant and necessary to rest, but we are commanded to rest on the Sabbath day. The fifth of the Ten Commandments refers to this as well as D& C 59:9-10. This day of rest after each six days of labor brings refreshment for the days that follow.

Maintaining our temporal independence and freedom in this world is not an easy task. President Marion G. Romney said "We believe [that] seldom [do circumstances arise in which] men of rigorous faith, genuine courage, unfaltering determination, with the love of independence burning in their hearts, and pride in their own accomplishments, cannot surmount the obstacles that lie in their paths. We know that through humble, prayerful, industrious, God-fearing lives, a faith can be developed within us by the strength of which we can call down the blessings of a kind and merciful Heavenly Father and literally see our handicaps vanish and our independence and freedom established and maintained."

Over twenty years ago my mother died after a somewhat lengthy battle with cancer. Many of you knew her and the special spirit she had. Well after raising us and living with my dad for over 30 years you know she had to be a special person. Any way how this ties in is dad had retired and was without insurance. When she died there were extensive hospital and doctor bills. After years of never borrowing and being self-reliant to a fault, he paid all the debt within two months.

While wrestling with trying to define and find the difference between spiritual and temporal self-reliance I was finally made aware why they are together under the same subject. The answer is; temporal self-reliance is spiritual self-reliance. President David O. McKay made this observation: "Outwardly, every act seems to be directed toward the physical: making of dresses and suits of clothes, canning fruits and vegetables, storing foodstuffs, and being frugal; all seem strictly temporal, but permeating all these acts, inspiring and sanctifying them, is the element of spirituality."

In the Doctrine and Covenants 29:34-35 we read:

"Wherefore, verily I say unto you that all things unto me are spiritual, and not at any time have I given unto you a law which was temporal; neither any man, nor the children of men; neither Adam, your father, whom I created.

"Behold, I gave unto him that he should be an agent unto himself; and I gave unto him commandments, but no temporal commandment gave I unto him, for my commandments are spiritual.

This scripture tells us there is no such thing as a temporal commandment. It also tells us that man is to be "an agent unto himself." Man cannot be an agent unto himself if he is not self-reliant. Independence and self-reliance are critical keys to our spiritual growth. Whenever we get into a situation which threatens our self-reliance we will find our free agency threatened as well. If we increase our dependence on anyone or anything, we will find an immediate decrease in our freedom to act. Likewise as parents, when we try to control our children beyond what is necessary to teach them right and wrong or responsibility or accountability or self-reliance, we take away their free agency as surely as if we were working for Lucifer.

Thus far, we should have learned that self-reliance is a prerequisite to the complete freedom to act. Hopefully we have also learned that there is nothing spiritual in self-reliance unless we make the right choices with that freedom. The key to making self-reliance spiritual is in using that freedom to comply with God's commandments.

Barriers to self-reliance are idleness, spending freely, breaking the commandments, indifference to home storage, no home food production, debt and interest payments and negative attitudes. Gateways to Self-reliance are industry and work, thrift, saving, budgeting, one year's supply of food, clothing, gardening, avoiding debt (when possible) and developing financial stability and working together as families to attain physical, emotional, and social health.

We are self-reliant when we take responsibility for our own physical and spiritual welfare. Through our own efforts and with guidance from our Heavenly Father, we can experience the feeling of self-worth that comes from being truly self-reliant. Brigham Young instructed the Saints, "Instead of searching after what the Lord is going to do for us, let us inquire what we can do for ourselves."

Now it doesn't take a genius to understand that before you can collect interest, you must first have some savings. Having savings while continuing to increase one's standard of living requires understanding of one simple practice and then religiously applying it. After paying your tithing of 10 percent to the Lord, you pay yourself a predetermined amount directly into savings. That leaves you a balance of your income to budget for taxes, food, clothing, shelter, transportation, etc. It is amazing that so many people work all of their lives to pay off the credit cards, the landlord, the power company, the automobile salesman, and the bank, and yet think so little of their own efforts that they pay themselves nothing.

Just as each individual is accountable for his choices and actions in spiritual matters, so also is he accountable in temporal matters. If we have been frugal and saved for a rainy day, then we can more easily weather the financial storm. If we have lived beyond our means, then we pay the consequences of our own actions when the bills come. If we have kept pace in our chosen field of labor, then we can anticipate advancement or increase as opportunity knocks.

I have two brothers-in-law here today who almost thirty years ago began their careers in computer design. We are not speaking of programming, rather chip design and construction. Ask them how easy it would be to behind in a field where speed increases exponentially.

It is through our efforts and decisions that we earn our way in this life. While the Lord will magnify us in both subtle and dramatic ways, he can only guide our footsteps when we move our feet. Ultimately, our own actions determine our blessings, or lack of them. It is a direct consequence of both agency and accountability. And since we are responsible for our actions, we are also personally accountable for their consequences. And though we cannot always directly trace the impact of our actions, they are subject to the law of the harvest, "that which we sow, we also shall reap." Are we talking only of our eternal rewards or is this also referring to our joy or agony in the actions of the children we raise?

Someone proposed a serious question to Elder L. Tom Perry a few years ago by asking, "What is the most important item to work on to be self-reliant?" His response was, "personal righteousness." It is important for us to have, as we have been counseled, a year's supply of food and clothing. We have also been counseled that we should have a reserve of cash to meet emergencies and to carry adequate health, home, and life insurance. Personal and family self-reliance, however, is much broader than these tangibles. It must include proper attitudes, a willingness to forego luxuries, prayerful consideration of all major purchases, and learning to live within our means.

If our Father in Heaven requires us as his children to be self-reliant, what duty do we have to our own children, those spirits who have been entrusted to our stewardship? Exercise wisdom in free agency. Make righteous choices, or should I say, Choose the Right?